John Marr's Corner Archive: aka the Marrchive
I would like to apologize in advance for the huge amount of grammatical errors and speeling mistakes. This computer has niether a spell check or a grammar check, and I am just too damn lazy to proofread.
Quotes of the month:
"Diego was never born, he's an ISAT project. You know the hovercraft, how they made the hovercraft at ISAT? Yeah, well some professor made Diego. What do ya think about that Diego? (Andrew) Ya got shrimp, yep?" - Gilmore/Diego
"She paid me a quarter for my services." - Eddie
"We bought all our songs on ebay. Buy three songs get brandon free. We were like shit, might as well buy three songs." - Gilmore
"Git Git Git Git Git Git Git Git Git Git" - Diego
"Iím watching you." - Ditka
So the other day I says to myself, I says why dont more people like GFA? Then I says to myself, I says its because 95% of the worlds population are complete idiots. Then I says to myself, I says, why dont I just write the best damn corner that the world has ever seen? ThenI says to myself, I says, that would be way to time consuming. So you are all going to have to deal with this one.
So youll notice that it has been over a month again. Or maybe you didnít. I dont think anyone really reads this. Not much has happened to the band in the last month. There was a party, and a show. There were exotic dancers, and hoís. There were beers and tears. There was laughing and sneers. This is really lame, I need to stop this rhyming crap.
On to the news:
Grounds for anything has its first official groupie. Although he prefers the title Super Groupie, you can call him Eddie, or Eddie Van Diego. Eddie is currently taking applicants to fill the job of Assistant Super Groupie, so if you or someone you know is interested drop him a line.
There are rumors that Diego and Gilmore may leave the band to pursue a side project. The band tentatively called Stick it in my Choch, also features Q from the Kane Davies, and me. If you like Ditka, you will love the Choch.
Speaking of Diego the band is going to have a contest at the next show. It is the "Be Diego for a Day Contest". Or the Biego contest for short. The winner will get to actually take over Diego for a day. Thats right I said take over, ala Being John Malkovich. They discovered a portal into Diegoís head, its behind his new Marshall Stack. If you want to enter simply send one case of beer, or other treats to 571 Pheasant Run Circle, Harrisonburg, VA 22801. The person that sends the best treats will win. Remember he is in your head, now is your chance to be in his.
As far as contests go, Gilmore has foolishly entered a contest he can never win. He has challenged me, and he will be crushed like a stick of wrigleys between the mighty jaws of Ditka. I cant wait for my victory cake, snapperhead!
There was a massive party that most of you true fans missed out on. It was the barbeque to be at. There were beers, chicken, and oh yeah, senior citizens. All in all the party was a success. It was someoneís 55th birthday, and he couldnt think of any better way to spend it then with GFA rocking his poolside shindig. So if you or someone you know is planning a get togethor let GFA know, they will not turn down any party, as long as there are free treats. Oh and if you are that lovely lady that was getting her groove on with John Gilmore, send us your home number. He was kicking himself for not getting it that night. All kidding aside, I want to thank the fine folks for having us, and say that I had a great time. When is the next one?
On behalf of the band I want to thank all of the people that came to the show. Alot of you drove several hours just to have your socks rocked off by the greatest band to ever come out of Harrisonburg. We know that there were close to fifty of you guys out there at Mainstreet, so why are there only 11 of us in the yahoo group? Come on, you guys will drive a few hours, but you wont take ten minutes to join the group and let GFA know that they do have fans? Join the Group! And sign the freakiní gustbook some time.
Oh yeah, if any body wants to feel really important at the next show, be a roadie. If you see the guys carrying stuff in give em a hand. They may even give you some treats.
So evey corner has ended with this same paragraph, why stop now?
Other bands have armies or groups, why would you want to deprive GFA of this experience? OK, so its not really my idea, all the credit goes to Mr. Andrew Diego, but I am going to run with it. We, the fans of GFA, need to form an army the likes of which the world has never known before. An army of brothers and sisters united and fighting for a simple common goal, to grant GFA more exposure, and ease their ascent into super stardom. An army of youth, filled with enough blinding devotion that the laws of man no
longer apply to them. An army of soccer hooligan-esqe escapades and adventures. An army that reguraly finds passed out college kids and tattoos the GFA logo across their forehead. Plus we will probably hand out fliers and the like. The GFA army will be known from this day forth as the GFA Bandits. If you want to become a member send me an e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org. Please put GFA in the title.
Yup, you couldíve been doing something important with your life right now, but instead you read this.
P.S. Shannon Sucks!
Back to the Marrchive